I'm just going to copy and paste this letter to the newspaper of the Greater Binghamton, NY area and hope that they don't slap me with a cease-and-desist letter. Because it's so funny, I don't think it needs commentary or insight from me.
Comparison insults zoo
I am tired of hearing that blight on Binghamton University, the men's basketball team, being referred to as a "zoo." The Binghamton Zoo at Ross Park has just received re-accreditation by the Association of Zoos and Aquariums, the industry's governing authority. We achieved this status by being in the top 10 percent of all the zoos in the country.
Our animal care, safety, employees and educational and service standards are set high and met accordingly. Not one of our tigers has been arrested with cocaine. No otter knocks over old ladies to shoplift condoms. Our bear doesn't have temper tantrums and storm off his exhibit. You won't find any of our lemurs busted for smoking pot. So, please, stop insulting zoos by comparing those criminals to us.
Amanda J. Padwa
Business Manager
Binghamton Zoo
Thanks to the ever-sharp-eyed Marco for forwarding this to me.
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The "BU Zoo" is actually the student section. But otters with jimmy-hats are always funny, regardless.